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Newest Member: LIttlemonster

Reconciliation :
Wedding Anniversary

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 HFSSC (original poster member #33338) posted at 4:22 AM on Monday, December 15th, 2025

It’s been a while since I posted here in Recon. I’ll copy and paste to the Positive R Stories thread as well.

JM and I celebrated our 29th anniversary today. 14 years since we renewed our vows. I can say with all honesty and zero hyperbole that we would not have made it without SI. And there’s a fairly good chance one or both of us would have chosen to take our own life during the fallout.

It’s been a really hard year. I’ve had lots of medical problems and finally had surgery last month to correct the source of all my problems. (I had hyperparathyroidism and even as a nurse I had NO idea how much those little suckers affect every part of your body.)

But some really good stuff has happened too. I finally left the toxic job that was killing me. Our son who failed out of a Military College graduated from another highly respected college with a solid GPA and a very useful degree. He also joined the NG to pay for college so we would not incur any more debt on his behalf.

His guard unit was informed last year that they were on a deployment countdown. So he and my lovely new daughter had to plan their wedding during a very tight window between his graduation, drill, annual training, and readiness exercises. They got married in August and it was truly one of the best days of my life.

He left in late October for a base in Tx where they flew out of. He spent a week in Kuwait, a couple of days in Iraq and is now settled where he will spend the next 9 months. I’ll just say that the news cycle yesterday was very upsetting and we didn’t sleep at all last night until he was able to reach us on Signal that he was okay. I stayed in close contact with our DIL yesterday and she is such a bright spot in my life.

We went to Dave and Busters. Had a great meal and then played arcade games like teenagers. We spent our "tickets" and followed our favorite tradition of picking out a kid to give our leftover tickets to. This adorable moppet was agonizing over her choices and we handed her 1600 more tickets to spend. smile

JM got a job early this year and is now a certified EMT. I was able to quit my part time job. Most of
My post up recovery has been just rest. The calcium dysregulation caused by HPT resulted in 3 fractures in my right foot. So I am out of work until at least Jan 13

I am profoundly grateful for the life I have. 2011 was awful. Zero stars. Do not recommend infidelity as a marriage improvement plan. But what we went through has made us who we are today. We don’t fight. We rarely disagree. We are enjoying our 4 dogs and the madness that entails. Our older son still lives with us but is learning skills at his own pace. He looks after my mom and JM’s dad, checking in on them several times daily, emptying trash, helping with chores. He is truly a delight.

I always think of DS during this time of year. She was gracious to me when I was an asshole and that’s the only reason I gained all the tools here.
I’m so thankful for her and MH and this site. I’m thankful for WOEZ, FloridaRedMan, Fallen, and Aubrie, who saw through JM’s BS and called him on it every time. JM still has a printout of a post he wrote about The Life Boat where he said he was bailing as fast as he could. FRM told him he had to quit blowing holes in the boat first.

I am grateful for PPGA, Boontje, Sisoon, Metamorphisis, Latebloomer…
So many people I can’t even list them all. But PPGA once drove over an hour out of her way to take me to lunch. And Aubrie drove an hour to meet us for lunch and let me meet her amazing and beautiful kids. I cannot overstate how much the personal connections I’ve made here have affected me. I still grieve for DS and Skan.

14 years out of infidelity. I have the marriage I always wanted. I trust JM implicitly, 100%. We have 2 sons who are successfully transitioning to adulthood. Life is sweet.

Me, 56
Him, 48 (JMSSC)
Married 26 years. Reconciled.

posts: 4974   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2011   ·   location: South Carolina
id 8884282
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